By Ed Martin, The Leader Editor

Help wanted: City of Lemoore seeking temporary help in manning the planning desk, providing technical planning support for 10-15 hours a week, and making the morning coffee.

The temporary planner will report to Public Works director who also happens to in charge of the Planning Department – in his spare time, for which he may not be compensated. For that 10-15 hours per week the applicant will be compensated at approximately $100,000 per year. Please be aware the compensation could be a little less or a little more, depending on the amount of planning that occurs, or whenever the money runs out, whichever comes first.

Must have at minimum a degree in something.

In addition, planner will help to overhaul the Lemoore Zoning Ordinance, despite the fact it was overhauled just last year. Planner will be paid an additional $30,000 to overhaul ordinance. Not sure how many hours that will take, but trust us, it’ll be worth it.

Keep in mind the goal is to keep the Lemoore developer community “happy.”

Any prospective applicants must be made aware that the prospective planner’s tenure could be cut short at any time, depending on the current mood of the city council, or at such time city seeks a full time planning department.

Also be aware that prospective planners must sit through long, tiresome meetings painfully listening to officials who like to hear themselves talk, sort of like watching a four-hour edition of Oprah.

Be forewarned that some city officials often like to change their minds, like when they rejected a Compressed Natural Gas maintenance facility five months ago, and when told they’d lose $300,000 of “free” money, suddenly approved the facility.

The new planner must learn how to bow.

New applicants must not be caught reading The Leader.