Issues that hit home: sidewalks, feral cats and gas tanks dominate City Council agenda

All kidding aside, Lemoore’s city leadership had a lot on its plate Tuesday night as it strives to solve the major problems facing Lemoore: the explosion of the feral cat population, who should be responsible for neighborhood sidewalks, the city’s shopping cart problem (yes, it’s a problem and has been for a long time), impact fees, and a local fairness issue involving a local gas station’s appeal of a conditional use permit that allows another proposed gas station to build its gas tanks above ground.

And you think Congress has its issues.

Turns out another gas station in town, located at Bush Street and Highway 41, was required to put its gas tanks underground when it was originally built in 2006-2007, thus creating a fairness issue. Placing gas tanks underground triggers a $.02 per gallon fee into the State of California’s Underground Storage Tank Cleanup Trust Fund.

The Lemoore Planning Commission recently approved a Conditional Use Permit that allows the owner of a proposed gas station to place his tanks above ground, giving the new guy a competitive advantage, because he won’t have to pay the fee.

Sounds unfair to me, and to the city’s credit, it is giving the Lemoore City Council, already overwhelmed by feral cats, the option of modifying its Conditional Use Permit to require the incoming gas station to place its gas tanks underground as well.

And you think Obama has his hands full with having to decide who gets to ride on Air Force One.

With these kinds of issues dominating the agenda, Lemoore’s councilmembers need a raise. Currently councilmembers earn $300 per month. The mayor earns $400 a month. Either give them a raise or give them a feral cat.

What is a “feral” cat? The definition of “feral” is an animal born into wildness, or has not had human interaction for a significant period of time (see also Donald Trump). Basically, they are stray animals, shunned by the community, no real home, and wandering aimlessly throughout the land causing problems (see Sarah Palin).

There is a “potential” ordinance on Tuesday’s agenda designed to make it unlawful to provide food, water or other sustenance to a feral cat – or Trump, and then to implement enforcement “mechanisms” to ensure compliance from cat lovers – or Republicans.

And what to do about stray shopping cards? Like the feral cats, stop feeding them.

Now, what do we do about Donald Trump? That will have to wait for the next agenda.